Ella

A couple of weeks ago, Ella turned 2.  It's hard to believe that she is two already.  It has flown by incredibly fast.  I wish I could capture Ella's personality in a word.  But I'm not sure which word would be exactly right.  I frequently tell her that she is "something else," and a "mess."  Aidan likes to sing "you're a humdinger!" to her when she is being especially Ella-like!  Maybe "humdinger" is the right word.  She makes me laugh out loud every day.  She is either dancing or throwing a fit; there is not much in between with her.  Thankfully, most of the time she's dancing.  and smiling.  and laughing.  But, when she's not, it's ugly.  and loud.
I love that she thinks she can do anything.  If her 7 year old brother can do it, she thinks she can too.  She'll try anything.  It's exhausting at times, but I love how fearless she is, and totally lacking in insecurity!  She is very sweet.  She loves to cuddle.  She takes care of her baby dolls like they are her real babies. She feeds them, rocks them and takes them for walks in her stroller.  She can't stand to see her brother sad.  She will put her arm around him and say, "are you okay, bubba?"  She loves to hold his hand when they are walking together.  If she gets hurt, she wants a hug from Aidan.

Jumping on the trampoline is one of her favorite things to do.  She giggles uncontrollably as she jumps and falls and rolls around.
She loves to swing more than anything else.  When she wants me to push her on the swing she yells, "more power!"

Whenever she sees her daddy, she starts dancing and singing, "daddy, daddy, daddy!"  There was never a daddy that loved a little girl more than Mark loves Ella.

As soon as we all sit down to eat dinner, she grabs mine and Aidan's hands and says, "pray?"  Sometimes, she sneaks food off her plate while we're praying.  When the prayer is finished, she shouts, "Amen!"  (I think some of her Pentecostal genes are shining through!)
If she wants you to do something she repeats it relentlessly.  She says, "come on Mommy" at least 500 times a day.
She has a temper.  If something doesn't go her way, she will fall face first on the ground and cry.  Then, like someone flipped a switch, she will stand up, smile, and say, "I'm better now!"
She loves to watch Dora, Diego and Wonder Pets.  If she needs your help with something, she starts singing, "teamwork!"
She would be happy to eat only popsicles every day, but will also eat chicken, spaghetti and chicken noodle soup if you cut her off from popsicles.  I think she is going to love ice cream as much as her daddy. He's going to finally have to share his ice cream.
She sleeps with a wind up giraffe that Aidan gave her.  She calls him Raffy.  She also sleeps with a soft fleece blanket that her Aunt Alissa gave her. She will not sleep with any other blanket, and you can't trick her.  She would rather sleep with no blanket than an impostor.
 Whenever she sees me, she acts like it's the best thing that's happened to her all day.  The whole world is delightful to her.  She takes joy in the simple things, like flowers and bugs and airplanes.  I hope she never loses that quality.  My heart overflows with love and joy for Ella.
So how do I sum up Ella in one word?  She is joy and love and innocence, full of promise and potential. She is both feisty and nurturing.  Her smile lights up the room.  Her bright blue eyes dance and twinkle.  She has a whole mess of shiny blonde hair.  Her laugh is contagious.  She doesn't walk, she skips.  No, one word just won't do it.  I guess we'll just have to stick with "humdinger" for now.

Not ME Monday!

I'm very happy to report that I did NOT turn off my alarm before church and then end up sleeping until 8:20, leaving only 25 minutes to get Ella and myself ready for church.  

I definitely did not bribe my 2 year old with a Rice Krispy Treat to get her in the car for church on Sunday morning.  Nor, did I let her take that same Rice Krispy Treat with her into the sanctuary so she could finish it before going to Sunday school.  And, I never would have let her wash down her Rice Krispy breakfast with a big sippy cup full of chocolate milk!  NO, not me.  Nutrition is too important to me.  Kids need to eat a healthy breakfast, and should never eat sweets in the middle of church.  I am far too good of a parent to resort to bribery of any kind.  I'm certain that it wasn't me.

Oh, and that child shouting, "Daddy!  I found him!  He's playing drums!  Daddy, daddy, daddy, I see you!" in the middle of the prayer at church...that wasn't my child either.

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Spring Break 2010

Spring Break Highlights:

*stayed up late

*slept in

*caught a fish

*took a long walk with Aidan in the woods

*skipped stones in the pond (at least, I tried to skip stones)

*pushed Aidan on his favorite wooden swing

*pushed Ella on the swing for as long as she wanted

*ran (and lost) relay races against Aidan, Mark and Lilly


*went for a boat ride

*paddled the boat all by myself

*tried to catch minnows in old salsa jars (it didn't work, but it was fun trying)

*laughed big belly laughs after my husband walked into a screen door

*read 2 books  (The AD Chronicles by Brock and Bodie Thoene...highly recommend them)

*sat on a porch swing with my husband just to talk

*enjoyed the spring flowers with Ella

*helped Aidan pull his tooth...the first one that HE pulled by himself...I just cheered him on.

*injured my nose while dancing (Mark's turn for big belly laughs)

*saw The Blindside with Mark (our first movie in about 10 mos...we were overdue!)

*Had a nice leisurely lunch at Olive Garden with Mark

*melted when Aidan grabbed my hand and said, "I love you, and I love going on adventures with you."

We had a great spring break...some much needed family time.  Wish we had more time.  How long until summer?

Easter Cookies

My mom sent this recipe to me last year after Easter.  I haven't tried it yet, but can't wait to do this with the kids this year.  You make them the night before Easter.

Ingredients:
1 c. whole pecans (or chocolate chips if you don't like nuts)
1 tsp. vinegar
3 egg whites
a pinch of salt
1 c. sugar
a zipper baggy
1 wooden spoon
scotch tape
Bible

**Preheat the oven to 300 degrees F.  This is very important to do before you make the cookies.  It will not work if you wait until you are half way done with the recipe.

1. Place the pecans in the zipper baggy.  Let the children beat them with the wooden spoon to break into small pieces.  Explain that after Jesus was arrested he was beaten by the Roman soldiers.  Read:  John 19: 1-3

2. Let each child smell the vinegar.  Put 1 tsp. vinegar into mixing bowl.  Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross He was given vinegar to drink.  Read John 19:28-30

3. Add egg whites to vinegar.  Eggs represent life.  Explain that Jesus gave his life to give us life.  Read: John 10: 10-11

4. Sprinkle a little salt into each child's hand.  Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl.  Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus' followers, and the bitterness of our own sin.  Read Luke 23:27.

5. So far the ingredients are not very appetizing.  Add 1 cup sugar.  Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because he loves us.  He wants us to know and belong to Him.  Read Psalm 34:8 and John 3:16.

6. Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12-15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed.  Explain that the color white represents the purity in God's eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus.  Read Isaiah 1:18 and John 3:1-3.

7.  Fold in broken nuts.  Drop by teaspoon onto waxed paper covered cookie sheet.  Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus' body was laid.  Read Matthew 27: 57-60.

8.  Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven OFF.

9.  Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door.  Explain that Jesus' tomb was sealed.  Read:  Matthew 27: 65-66

10.  Go to Bed!  Explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight.  Jesus' followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed.  Read John 16: 20-22

11.  On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie.  Notice the cracked surface and take a bite.  The cookies are hollow!  On the first Easter, Jesus' followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty.  Read Matthew 28:1-9

Let me know how yours turn out if you try it.

Overwhelmed and Distracted

Wow...I had such good intentions when I started this blog! It's been 5 months since I've posted anything. I guess it's true what they say about good intentions. You may be able to guess from the title of this post why I haven't been writing lately. It's something God's been dealing with me about quite a bit lately. Do you ever have times when God just WON'T leave you alone about something? I went to a Priscilla Shirer Going Beyond conference in February and was very convicted about being present in my own life. I decided then that I needed to be more purposeful and more focused on what it is God wants me to be doing. And ever since that conference I cannot open my Bible, or read a devotional or a blog without it being about this same issue. Okay God, I get it.

I am a very "busy" person. I am task oriented. It feels good to me when I can do something and check it off the list. It's like a drug. It makes me feel better. I like lists. I like tasks that are cut and dry...that I can finish and see the results. I know that my focus right now is to raise my kids to love God and to love people. But, I can't put that on a check list. I can't check it off. How do I know when I've completed that task. I'm not even sure exactly how to complete that task. So much goes into raising them. I get overwhelmed. It's so easy to "check out" when I get overwhelmed. This is the thorn in my side. Satan doesn't have to tempt me with the "big" sins, because I get distracted just trying to do what is right.

One of the hardest things for me about being a stay at home mom is the lack of feedback. How do you know if you're doing a good job with your kids? I guess you just have to wait and see how they turn out...but then it's too late to change anything. It would be nice if I could get a yearly performance review like when I was teaching. I'm sure mine would go something like this: loving--exceeds expectations, snuggling--exceeds expectations, patient--needs improvement, manages time wisely--needs improvement, trusts God with the future--needs improvement.

There's an image I keep playing over and over again in my head. Priscilla Shirer's grandmother, who is over 90 years old, was at the Going Beyond conference. Priscilla and her brother honored her at the conference. I was so touched as I thought what it must be like for that grandmother to sit in the audience and watch her grandson lead over 3,000 women in worshipping God. He is a very successful worship leader. His heart for worshipping God was very evident. Then, she got to watch her granddaughter teach these same women about God and about how to love God more. The love that Priscilla and her brother had for God and for each other was almost tangible, as was the love and respect they had for their grandmother. I kept thinking, "what a legacy."

Keeping that in mind, I have new focus in raising my kids. Someday, I want to be able to sit back and watch my kids and grandkids doing great things for God...because they love him. Above all, I want them to love God deeply. If I can help them do that, then I will have been successful. Out of their love for him, all other things will fall into place. They will do the work that he has for them, they will love and have mercy for hurting people, they will love each other, they will have joy. What else could a mother want for her kids? I know I will have to fight against all the things that try to distract me from that purpose, but it's a fight worth fighting.

Thinkin...

Well, I've been thinking that it's probably time to update the blog.  I've thought and thought about it, but no inspiration has struck.  I'm sure the kids have done some cute things I could tell about, but my brain is so tired, I just can't remember.  In fact, my brain is SO tired, I can hardly focus on anything.  So, here are some random things I've been thinking about lately (a rare glimpse into the scary place that is my mind):

*Pumpkins

*Old trucks

*work boots

*Why did Barack Obama win a Nobel Peace Prize?

*Hess and Lorene

*Sun tea

*When will it stop raining?

*What color should I paint the bathroom?

*the joy of giving

*how to give and receive grace

*the freedom that comes with forgiveness

*the swine flu vaccine

*the blessing of good friends

*the urge to get away

*the longing to stay home

*the miracle of God's provision

*spanx

*crunchy leaves

*why would anyone want to blast something into the moon?

*fresh tomatoes

*mason jars

*comfortable southern accents

*sad endings

*friends that are hurting

*How can such a little girl have such a big personality?

*Is it really necessary to have 57 screaming fits a day?  (I'll let  you decide if that's me or Ella having the fits!)

*the difficulty of letting go

*dishes and laundry

*health care

*banana pudding

*real cowboys

*early onset terrible twos

I could go on and on...but, a tiny dictator is screaming at me, so I must go now!

It's a Wonderful Life

I've been doing a Bible study called One in a Million by Priscilla Shirer.  It has caused me to really start looking at my life...my relationships, my blessings, my walk with God.  It's mostly been encouraging, as I see how far I've come with God, but sometimes convicting.  As I take stock of my life, I can't help but think of It's a Wonderful Life.  This movie shaped a significant portion of my world view.  I watched it every year at Christmas time...I still do.  I love it when George Bailey puts Mr. Potter in his place and calls him a scurvy little spider.  I love the wise, if awkward angel, Clarence.  It's his words that I've been thinking about mostly lately.  "Strange, isn't it?  Each man's life touches so many other lives.  When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?"

My life has certainly been touched by so many people in such a powerful way.  I know looking back that God sent each of them into my life at a specific time for a specific purpose.  Early on, there was my mom...so strong and resilient, and my grandparents...they taught me to put God first in everything, and countless others...aunts, uncles, teachers, and friends.  They all made a profound impact on me.  And then, there was Aidan...sent to me at a very dark time in my life, when I was far away from God and my heart was so sad.  Aidan, this precious little boy, was God's grace that I could hold in my arms.  He taught me about unconditional love.  He was sent to rescue me from myself.  Next, was Mark...he was sent to heal all my hurts and insecurities.  And then, there was Ella.  I can hardly speak her name without smiling and laughing.  She was sent to teach me about the abundant life God offers.  She is pure joy in the cutest little package you've ever seen.  Getting her here was difficult...I had trouble getting pregnant with her, and then the pregnancy was HORRIBLE.  Even in this, God showed his provision for us by sending good friends to help all along the way.  They prayed with me when I was scared that I would lose Ella.  They cooked us dinner every night while I was on bed rest.  They cleaned our house and baby sat Aidan.  More people...touching our lives in a special way.  

We literally had NO money when I was pregnant with Ella, a very scary prospect with a baby on the way.  But, once again, God was faithful.  When we found out she was a girl, I panicked...girls need clothes and clothes cost money.  On the way home from the sonogram, I whispered a prayer and decided in my heart to trust God with providing for our little girl.  We did not make it home before a friend called to tell us they were getting rid of all their girls' baby clothes and we could have them if we wanted them.  Bags and bags of the cutest clothes you've ever seen, enough to last for the first year...all provided because some dear friends allowed God to use them that day.  Another friend helped me paint her nursery.  Another friend gave me a baby shower.  More friends gave me a diaper shower...I received enough diapers to last me the first 8 months or longer! One Saturday night, towards the end of my pregnancy, I took inventory of what we still needed for Ella's nursery.  I put a curtain down on my list, and knew we couldn't afford it.  I told myself a curtain was a want, not a need and God would provide our needs.  Well, God apparently had other ideas because the next day at church another friend approached me, and I'm not kidding, said, "I want to make a curtain for Ella's room"...I had not told anyone we needed a curtain!  The curtain is adorable and always reminds me that God wants to provide lavishly for us...not just the bare minimum.  I could go on and on and on.  

I learned a lot about God through that experience.  In fact, I have yet had to buy Ella a single stitch of clothing.  Just this weekend, a friend gave me 3 large bags of clothes, and we are set for at least another year!  I laughed out loud as I went through them.  I told my husband that God was just showing off now.  I now fully understand the verse about giving that says, "Give and it will be given to you, A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap."  Ella's clothes had to be pressed together to fit into her closet, which is now running over with clothes.

I want to be like the friends and family that touched my life in this time.  I want to be like George Bailey, the richest man in town.  In this season of my life, I don't have the time or resources to start a large ministry.  But, I want to be available to God to use in these small but meaningful ways.  I want to touch those lives around me and leave them better than before.  I want to do it as an offering of praise and gratitude to the God who has never abandoned me and has been exceedingly gracious and generous with me.  He is a good Father, and I want to be like Him.  It is a Wonderful Life and "no man is a failure who has friends."